Lamenting the Violence (Pastoral Letter on the Uvalde Shooting)

"Thoughts and Prayers" by A. Mattson

“How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? … How long must I bear pain in my soul, and have sorrow in my heart all day long? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?” (Psalm 13:1-2)

The past two weeks have been punctuated with awful violence. 

On May 13, a public playoff party in Milwaukee turned into chaos when gun battles broke out and injured 21 people. The next day, a racist gunman entered a grocery store in Buffalo, New York, and killed 10 people. Then the next day, a man walked into a church in Laguna Woods, California, and shot 6 people, killing one, because of political hatred towards Taiwanese independence. And then this week, we saw yet another school shooting in which a young man killed 19 children and 2 adults, and wounded 17 more. 

And if all of that weren’t horrifying enough, the war in Ukraine continues to kill over one hundred people per day, according to one estimate, and a bombshell report came out over the  weekend that the Southern Baptist Convention has spent decades ignoring or belittling victims of sexual violence by church leaders.

Following previous tragedies — like Sandy Hook, the Sikh temple shooting, the Boston Marathon bombing, the Charleston Nine, Parkland, the Miller Brewery shooting, and probably more —  I have written a pastoral letter (such as I am now) to offer perspective and hope. Each one gets harder, and I must admit I am struggling to find the words to write this time. The words that keep coming to me are from a hymn based on Psalm 13: “‘How long, O God?’ The psalmist cries, a cry we make our own, for we are lost, alone, afraid, and far away from home” (“How Long, O God,” Ralph F. Smith).

How long, indeed. 

In the midst of my pain and frustration at yet more violence, these words remind me of a gift from Scripture that we often forget: the practice of lament. In our culture, we often focus on the positive and dismiss the negative, but this isn’t what we find in scripture. Almost half of the Psalms are laments; the book of Job is pages of complaints about the injustice of the world and demanding to hear from God; the prophet books are filled with commands to repent and weep over the evil people have done; and there’s even a whole book called “Lamentations.” 

Instead of ignore the negative and focus on the positive, the Bible encourages us to name the negative and pray for the positive. After all, it’s not a surprise that the world is not as God intended it. Since the beginning, humans have been rebelling against God’s plan for the flourishing of life on earth in favor of our own ideas. (That rebellion is what we call sin.) 

Lament is a way of naming the world’s brokenness and that we are victims (and perpetrators) of that sin. Though lament can feel overly critical or negative towards God, it is one way of us turning back to God for answers, which is what we should be doing anyways. If human rebellion created these problems, we need holy wisdom to solve them. 

So I have words of hope that I will continue to share and suggestions for steps forward, but I also invite you to join me in lament. I have been crying to God about the evil in this world, and I will pray for “Your kingdom come,” and I will listen for the wisdom of the Holy Spirit to lead me forward so that I can be part of the healing. And then I will hope in the last stanza of the hymn: “‘How long, O God?’ The psalmist cries, a cry we make our own. Though we are lost, alone, afraid, our God will lead us home.” 

In God’s Grip,

Pastor Ari

"I'm trying, I'm trying to sleep, but I can't, but I can't when you all have guns for hands." -twenty one pilots, "Guns for Hands"

Suggestions for Faithful Responses

Pray Honestly and Personally

Pray to God and don’t be afraid to ask questions like “How long?” Or “Where are you?” Martin Luther said prayer is “rubbing God’s ears with God’s promises.” (“Hey, God! You promised life and peace. Where is it?”) But it’s also helpful to pray, “How can I help?” Ask for help in being a peacemaker. 

Read the Psalms 

Whatever you are feeling or experiencing has been seen by God’s people before. The Psalms are a wonderful record of the highs and lows of our experience with God. They make beautiful prayers, conversation starters, or just reminders that we are not alone. 

Be Aware of Your Feelings…

Sometimes we dismiss our feelings, but they are an important part of how God created us. Anger and pain can be warning lights that something isn’t right and needs to be fixed. When we are aware of them and ask, “Why am I so upset?” or “What specifically is making me feel hurt?”, those questions can help us get to the root of the emotions and how to respond constructively. 

…But Not Driven by Them

At the same time, if we let our emotions control us, we can create more problems. If fear or anger hardens into hate against a person or group (“it’s their fault…”), it continues the cycle. Sin is a disease in all of us and indulging it on one side does not correct it on another. The men who took guns into public places did so because there was a “they” who needed to be eliminated. 

Connect With People

One root of violence is frequently social isolation, loneliness, and a lack of loving relationships. The pandemic and other trends in our society have created more, not less, of these. We can’t prevent all evil and no one action is guaranteed to prevent evil, but many drops of water turn a mill. Chat with a neighbor or relative, send a note or text, meet someone new, or just smile at everyone for a day. We are called to love God and our neighbor; the best way is often to love God BY loving our neighbor. 

Write to Your Legislators

We are blessed to live in a country that allows us to elect and petition our government and as people of faith, we are called to speak up for the vulnerable and suffering. I will be the first to acknowledge our government is not as responsive to voters as it should be, but it is an important tool we have and I have seen letter writing change policy before. 

The Cry of the Prophet: A Response to the El Paso and Dayton Shootings

"O Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not listen? Or cry to you 'Violence!' and you will not save? Why do you make me see wrongdoing and look at trouble? Destruction and violence are before me; strife and contention arise. So the law becomes slack and justice never prevails." -Habakkuk 1:2-4a

"Lament" by Jeffery. flickr.com

This past weekend, our nation was once again rocked with news of mass shootings. This time they were only 13 hours apart in El Paso, Texas and Dayton, Ohio. As of this writing, there are 31 people dead and 50 injured, not counting the people killed and injured a week before at a Walmart in Mississippi or a festival in Gilroy, California or the dozens of others this year alone.

Mass shootings are a crime that always grab my attention, partly because one of the first took place a few miles from my home in Oregon. And whenever there is a national tragedy, I feel compelled to offer a pastoral word in sermon or letter to my congregation.

I've done this after the Sikh temple shooting in Oak Creek, WI...

and the Newtown shooting...

and the Boston bombing...

and the Charleston shooting...

and the Ferguson protests...

and the Charlottesville violence...

and... and...

This week, however, I found that I didn't know what to say. I've spent the past four days staring at my screen at a loss for words.

How many times can you say, "God weeps with us" and "Jesus is making the world better" before they just feel hollow and cliché?

How can I proclaim hope when it seems that nothing ever changes?

It was in the midst of this that I stumbled upon Habakkuk and found the words I needed. Habakkuk is one of the Minor Prophets in the Hebrew Scriptures (or Old Testament) and I mean minor. It is about a page and half long in most Bibles and it is not a favorite for pastors to preach or teach because it is a lament. But that is why it is perfect for me this week.

Habakkuk is a prophet crying out to God about how violent and corrupt and terrible the world is. "Destruction and violence are before me... and justice never prevails," he says in his opening words. He's basically writing a letter to God to say, "Dude! What the hell?"

It is a type of writing that is actually pretty common in the Bible. Lamentations, Ecclesiastes, portions of the prophets and MANY of the Psalms (e.g. Psalms 13 and 130) have a similar theme and they hold a great lesson for us: we can be honest and frank with God. Sometimes we find the strength to say or do the right thing, but sometimes we just need to scream or cry or fall apart and God knows that.

So if we are angry about the state of the world, God can take it; if we need to cry over senseless deaths, God will listen; if we can't figure out how to move forward because we feel lost, God is patient; if we can't do or offer anything positive because we just feel empty and overwhelmed, God understands.

Habakkuk eventually hears from God ends his letter with a word of hope: "Though the fig tree does not blossom, and no fruit is on the vines...yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will exult in the God of my salvation" (3:17-18).

Hopefully tomorrow I will rejoice in the Lord, too, but today I'm angry and sad. And that's okay because it puts me in the company of God's saints through the ages.

Come quickly, Lord.


Standing in the Gray,

Pastor Ari

“But you don't get thick skin without being burnt.” -twentyone pilots, “The Hype"

(Even pastors need to hear the Gospel from others. Thank you to those who spoke to me this week.)

What is Appropriate Prayer?

For the past month, Milwaukee has been buzzing. Our local Major League team, the Brewers, was on a tear. They finished with the best record in the National League, made the playoffs for the first time in seven years, and won twelve in a row to win the NL Central title and sweep the first round of the playoffs. It has seemed like everyone was wearing Brewers gear and talking baseball in our area.

On Saturday, the Brewers hosted game 7 of the NL Championship against the LA Dodgers with a chance to go to the World Series for the first time since 1982 and the city was electric.

But they lost. No World Series. No more season. There was no joy in Mudville, for mighty Casey had struck out...

The next morning, during the late worship service at my church, the assisting minister added an impromptu petition to the prayers that was something like: "Lord, help us in our grief over our baseball team losing. We wanted to go to the World Series and it hurts. Help us get over it and look forward to next season."

In the moment, I didn't know exactly what to think about the prayer. I wondered if some would be offended by including something like a sports team in the prayers. Would some feel it wasn't appropriate for the prayers in church? Did I?

As I continued to think about it, I remembered that I myself often tell people there is no bad prayer. "Prayer," I say, "is just speaking honestly with God." I sometimes use the examples of Psalm 137 or Psalm 109, where the writers pray for God to bring suffering to their enemies. I also use them as examples of the truth that God is with us in times of pain and suffering. If those bitter songs are saved as examples of prayer in the Bible, we can be honest with our own pain, anger, or whatever we feel.

As I thought about it, I realized this prayer was speaking honestly with God. She was saying, "Sure, it's just a baseball team, but a lot of us here are hurting today. If you're with us in any suffering, please be with us in this time of pain." In a different situation, it might have been silly or frivolous, but on that morning, it was true and sincere. That, I believe is God's hope for our prayers, because when we are honest about ourselves, we can be more open to what God has to say to us.

May we all be reminded that there is no part of our lives that is beyond God and nothing that God doesn't want to hear from us. 

From the Gray,

Pastor Ari

“I’m-a say all the words inside my head.” -Imagine Dragons, “Believer”

Habits We Are Proud to Have

Over the years, I've made many pastoral visits with people who have advanced dementia or Alzheimers. Most of them are largely unaware of what's going on around them and many struggle to communicate at all. However, there have been several occasions when as soon as I start speaking the Lord's prayer, the person will begin speaking along with me. It's clear that the language is so familiar that they know it even if they can't communicate on a conscious level.

Their example makes me think about my own habitual actions. I can make coffee in the morning when I'm half-asleep (thank goodness). I buckle my seatbelt every time I get in a car without thinking about it. These habits start as conscious actions, but repeated often enough become muscle memory (literal or figurative).

Any action repeated often enough can become a mindless habit...good or bad. You see, I also drive pretty aggressively because years of driving in Philadelphia turned that into a habit. (Good thing I buckle that seatbelt.) I'm not sure that's a habit I want.

Are the actions I'm taking now going to build habits that reflect the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) or will they show impatience, frustration, or apathy?

What actions are you practicing repeatedly? Are they the kind you want to be habits? Are they the kind you want people to remember when are to old to remember yourself?

From the Gray,
Pastor Ari


"This is your life. Are you who you want to be?" -Switchfoot, "This is Your Life"